February 2011
AVPS Survey
Favorites: 5 Fav Scenes: 1. Mama Umbridge talkin to Umbridge 2. When Firenze decides to take Umbridge to mate with the centaurs. 3. When Harry and Ron meet. 4. When Lupin is trying to get everyone to sing Hermione Can’t Draw 5. When Hedwig says there’s no mail from Lucias and Draco falls on the floor 5 Fav Songs: 1. Hermione Can’t Draw 2. Guys Like Potter 3. Gettin Along 4. No...
Gosh, Tumblr...
Wow even on Tumblr I feel like I have to post certain posts or I won’t be cool. I have to post the coolest picture of a girl with long hair in ray bans in the sun and frankly it’s become quite a cliche and I’m sick of it.
So there Tumblr. I just whooped your ass. Don’t let it happen again or I’m gonna come and pop you again!
Terry: No, I don't like you. I think you're a fake cop. The sound of your piss hitting the urinal, it sounds feminine. If you were in the wild, I would attack you, even if you weren't in my food chain. I would go out of my way to attack you. If I were a lion and you were a tuna, I would swim out in the middle of the ocean and freaking eat you and then I'd bang your tuna girlfriend!
Allen: OK, first off: a lion, swimming in the ocean? Lions don't like water. If you placed it near a river or some sort of fresh water source, that make sense. But you find yourself in the ocean, 20 foot waves, I'm assuming off the coast of South Africa, coming up against a full grown 800 pound tuna with his 20 or 30 friends, you lose that battle! You lose that battle 9 times out of 10! And guess what, you've wandered into our school of tuna and we now have a taste of lion. We've talked to ourselves. We've communicated and said 'You know what? Lion tastes good, let's go get some more lion'. We've developed a system to establish a beach-head and aggressively hunt you and your family and we will corner your pride, your children, your offspring!
Terry: How you gonna do that?
Allen: We will construct a series of breathing apparatuses with kelp. We will be able to trap certain amounts of oxygen. It's not gonna be days at a time. An hour? Hour forty-five? No problem. That will give us enough time to figure out where you live, go back to the sea, get some more oxygen, and stalk you.... You just lost at your own game. You're outgunned and out-manned.
...
Allen: Did that go the way you thought it was gonna go? Nope.
January 2011
Will: Can anyone tell me what a ballad is?
Brittany: A male duck.
Will: ???
Will: Ok we're gonna draws names from this hat to see who you're partner is gonna be.
Brittany: I bet the duck's in the hat.
“She’s who they sent me to when they found that bird in my locker…”
– Brittany - Glee
Music you NEED to Hear.
For the First Time - The Script
Musical Soulmate - Mark Salling
Mine is Yours - Cold War Kids
Last Chance - Nicki Manaj
All These Things That I’ve Done - The Killers
Read My Mind - The Killers
Blue Blood -Foals
The Hunger Games Cast (in my opinion).
Katniss: Taylor Momsen (with dark hair of course).
Gale: Mark Salling
Peeta: Lucas Till
Rue: Elle Fanning
Prim: Broklynn Proulx
Haymitch: Hugh Laurie
Snow: Martin Sheen
Madge: Emma Watson
Effie: Kristen Chenoweth
Cinna: Stanley Tucci
An Atheist Professor of Philosophy was speaking to...
Professor: You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Professor: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Professor: My brother died of cancer, even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn’t. How is God good, then? Hmm?
(Student was silent)
Professor: You can’t answer, can you? Let’s start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Professor: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From.. God.
Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student: Yes.
Professor: So who created evil?
(Student didn’t answer)
Professor: Is there sickness? Immortality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, who created them?
(Student had no answer)
Professor: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son.. have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your God.
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God, for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.
Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Professor: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, Science says your God doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor: Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Professor: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as Cold?
Professor: Yes.
Student: No, sir, there isn’t.
(The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of Heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There was a pin-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?
Student: You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light… But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and it’s called Darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, You would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?
Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Professor: If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?
(The class was in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?
(The class broke out into laughter)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? .. No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable and Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures?
(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)
Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student: That is it, sir.. exactly! The link between man and God is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving!
----------------------------------------------------
That student was Albert Einstein.
Brilliant.
This is the best thing I've read in a long time.
Reblog if you thought the lyrics to the song "I'm...
brideofcharlie:
smokemeimdope-:
when the lyrics really are: “I’m blue if I was green I would die, if I was green I would die, if I was green I would die”
WAIT.
WAIT.
WAIT.
THOSE AREN’T THE WORDS?!
While walking with your friends...
… Cool boys and their friends
… Cool girls and their friends
… You and your friends
Facebook vs Tumblr: Charlie McDonnell Edition
charlieiscoollike:
Someone I don’t know adds me on Facebook:
Someone I don’t know follows me on Tumblr:
Someone writes on my wall:
Someone writes in my Tumblr ask box:
Lose a friend on Facebook:
Lose a follower on Tumblr:
Error on Facebook:
Error on Tumblr:
On Valentine's Day:
woodrape:
What my friends will be doing:
What I’ll be doing:
When someone talks shit about me :
When they talk shit about my friend
When they talk shit about my bestfriend
When they talk shit about a family member
When they talk shit about harry potter
Summary of my life.
Liz! I'm so glad you're back!
Is anyone else as completely and utterly thrilled as I am that My Life As Liz is returning?! Eeeeep!
GLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!...
So I just finished the first season and OHHHHMYGOOOOOOOD!!!!!!! IT WAS INSAAAAAAAAAAAANE!!!!!!! SOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH BETTER THAN I THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA BE!!!!
Ok let’s get serious and organized. The season one review.
Will: kinda pissed me off but a good teacher
Emma: so adorable!!! I just wanted to give her a (sanitized) hug!
Sue: my hero. She could care less what’s the right thing to...
Time Travel
I have realized that this is my own little place to completely tell whatever the hell I feel like so once again, I will vent. Lately I have, subconsciously but then again consciously, been treating my body with a little more respect. My low cut shirts are being paired with a cami or not being worn at all and when I wear skirts the length is becoming lower. And I have all together stopped wearing...
Aaaand I’ve decided that I am completely in love with Quinn Fabray and I want Rachel to transfer schools. She pisses the hell out of me.
I’ve noticed that Will Schuster from Glee is kind of a man slut… And he reminds me of a lizard.
The (New!) 10 Day Challenge. -10 Confessions-
I think drinking apple juice from a sippy cup is so much cooler than drinking beer until you throw up.
I have a purity ring and I will shove it in all of your sexually active faces.
I really and truly dislike my name because it’s too common.
I believe in reincarnation because I have these weird flashbacks that I never lived from a different time.
I aspire to be different but yet I...
GLEE!!
I thought I wouldn’t be the one to jump on the band wagon but save me a seat here I come! I’m about halfway through season 1 and I am truly and desperately in love. Finn is the most amazing guy I have ever known on a televised production. I love Mercedes and the way she stands up for being black. Kurt is my hero an I adore his dad for being so supportive. Mr. Shu is a tad annoying...
Glee?
I’m just about to start watching the first season of Glee. I’ve never seen an episode of it before but here we go…
I am weareforeverchildren!!!
Just so we’re clear I just changed my name from weareforeverchildren to mentalpassport! I am still Rachel and you did not lose a follower! Take a chill pill.
Don’t you love when your feeling giddy and you see the ice cream truck and decide to wave to the driver out of pure happiness and he pulls over thinking you want something and when you tell him you were just saying hi, he flips you off and speeds away. I have complete faith in humanity.
Metal Rain
The forecast was sunny with little clouds. For the whole week. The way it had always been in California. Although these days California wasn’t the land of plenty. Sure there was plenty of hate, but nothing else. Nowadays it didn’t matter what kind of person you were. What only mattered was what race you were. Black. Asian. Latino. White. The minorities were quickly becoming the...
“Stand for life. Stand for truth. Stand for something, don’t fall for...”
– Colors - will.i.am